250+ Cheesy and Funny Pick Up Lines(Update 2018)

cheesy pick up lines

Is there any faster way to someone’s heart — or pants — than humor? Hilarious cheesy pick up lines will get her to smile every single time. Make her laugh and look forward to a great night. We’ve gathered together 252 cheesy and funny pick up lines that will definitely make him or her laugh.

252 Best Cheesy and Funny Pick Up Lines

  1. Is your dad a thief or something? Because someone definitely stole the stars and placed them in your eyes.

  2. They claim Disney land is the happiest place. Clearly, no one has ever stood next to you.

  3. I am a thief, and I’m here to steal your heart.

  4. See my friend over there;? He wants to know whether you think I am cute.

  5. I wish I were your tears so I could start in your eyes, live on your face, and die on your lips.

  6. My friends bet I cannot start a conversation with the hottest person in the bar. Do you want to buy some drinks using their money?

  7. Am I cute already or do you need more drinks?

  8. I am sorry, are you talking to me? [No] Well, then please start.

  9. I think you’re the reason for global warming because you’re extremely hot.

  10. I am no mathematics genius, but I am pretty good with numbers. Give me yours and see what I’ll do with it.

  11. I think I need to call heaven because they’ve lost one of the angels.

  12. Do you have a tan or do you always look this hot?

  13. Is your name Gillette? Because you’re the best thing a man could get.

  14. There is only one thing I would like to change about you, and that is your last name.

  15. Your body is made up of 90% water, and I am thirsty.

  16. Will you take me to the doctor? I just broke my leg falling for you.

  17. That is a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?

  18. You’re so beautiful you just made me forget my pick up line.

  19. What has up to 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.

  20. Did the sun rise or did you just smile at me?

  21. If you were a new sandwich at Mcdonalds, they would call you McGorgeous.

  22. If I had four quarters to give the four, most-prettiest girls in the world, you would receive a dollar.

  23. You might as well sleep with me because I am going to tell everyone we did anyway.

  24. You must be a broom because you just swept me off my feet.

  25. It is a good thing I brought my library card with me because I am checking you out.

  26. Do not tell me if you want me to take you out tonight or not. Just smile for Yes or do a backflip for No.

  27. I am actually a new medicine for the common cold. Doctors recommend that you apply me to your sensitive areas.

  28. Are you sure you are not tired? You have been running through my mind all day.

  29. My muscle aches are nothing compared to the heartache you are causing me.

  30. Just like a broken pencil, life without you is pointless.

  31. You’re hotter than my fiver.

  32. May I follow you home? Because my mom always told me to follow my dreams.

  33. Do you have a cold? Because you are giving me the chills.

  34. According to expert doctors, the best way to cure a cold is to kiss someone else. How can we argue with medicine?

  35. Is your name Sun? because you are hot.

  36. I do not think this night can get any better. Wanna make it?

  37. Hello, do you have a couple of minutes for me to hit on you?

  38. Are you an alien? Because you just abducted my heart.

  39. Can I buy you a shot? [No] How about dinner?

  40. Would you like to be my dirty little secret?

  41. They say kissing is a language of love. How about we start a conversation?

  42. Hey, sorry, I think you owe me a drink. “Why?” because when I looked at you, I dropped mine.

  43. Are you a banana? Because I find you a-peeling.

  44. Hey, I just realized this, but you look a lot like my next girlfriend.

  45. Hello, how are you? [fine] Hey, I did not ask you how you looked.

  46. Let us exchange genetic information

  47. I can’t hold on anymore. I’ve already fallen for you.

  48. If a beautiful face could kill, you would be a weapon of mass destruction.

  49. I never need to see the sun again because your eyes light up my world.

  50. I am leaving this place. Would you like to come?

  51. I will marry you tomorrow, but let us have “honeymoon” tonight.

  52. I thought happiness starts with an H. why does mine start with U?

  53. I hope someday I will be your emergency contact

  54. Hi, you look sexy, is there more to you than meets the eye?

  55. I would like to bet my $100 that you are going to deny me a kiss.

  56. Can I take your temperature? You look damn hot today.

  57. I do not know what’s prettier today, the sky, the weather, the water, or your eyes.

  58. Do I know you? “NO.” well, that’s a shame I would sure like to.

  59. I just realized I have 12 hours to live. Please do not let me die a virgin.

  60. Are you from Paris? Because Ei-feel for you.

  61. I am not actually this tall; I am just sitting on my wallet.

  62. Are you a banker? Because you’ve got my interest.

  63. I have to show you the prettiest girl I have ever seen. (then show her the front camera of your phone.)

  64. Do you like sleeping? Me too! We should do it together sometime.

  65. ICU in my dreams

  66. Is your dad a baker? Because you’ve got a beautiful set of buns.

  67. (take a photo of her) I would like to show my mom what my next girlfriend looks like.

  68. I’ll cook you dinner, and you’ll cook me breakfast.

  69. Somebody call the cops because I’m sure its illegal to look that sexy.

  70. I think I could fall madly in bed with you.

  71. No wonder the sky is grey today. All the blue is in your eyes.

  72. You must be a coronary artery because you are wrapped around my heart

  73. Your name must be yogurt because I want to spoon you.

  74. Let me tie your shoes. I would not like you to fall for someone else.

  75. I think I’m in a museum because you truly are a work of art.

  76. If you were a vegetable, you would be a cute-cumber.

  77. Wanna go study some anatomy?

  78. I believe there is no word in the dictionary for how good you look.

  79. For some reason, I was feeling off all day today. But when you came along, you undoubtedly turned me on.

  80. Are you an online order I placed a couple of days ago? Because I have been waiting for you all day.

  81. Are you drowning? Because I feel like giving you CPR.

  82. Are you a supermarket sample? Because I would like to taste you over and over again without any sense of shame.

  83. You remind me of magnets because you definitely are attracting me over here.

  84. If ladies were landing pages, I would only be interested in converting you.

  85. Hey gorgeous, Roses are red, violets are blue, I am no poet, but damn girl you are hot.

  86. You can spam me all night, but I will still not unsubscribe

  87. Hello, My name is “Nahashon,” but you can call me tonight.

  88. Now I understand why Solomon had 700 wives. It is because he never met you.

  89. Do you like blueberries and bananas? [WHY] I would like to know what kind of pancakes to make you every morning.

  90. I believe one of your ribs belongs to me.

  91. I am not a genie, but I can make your dreams come true.

  92. If I were a cat, I would spend all nine lives with you.

  93. Girl, you turn my floppy disk into a hard drive.

  94. A song from your lips is an aria from heaven.

  95. Are you a tamale? ‘Cause you’re hot.

  96. Can I have directions? [“To where?”] To your heart.

  97. Coffee? Tea? Me?

  98. Good evening. May a thorn sit down amongst the roses?

  99. Guy: What’s your name? Girl: Danielle Guy: Oh… I thought it was Aphrodite.

  100. I’ve seen till I gazed into your eyes.

  101. He: You look like my third wife. She: Oh, how many time have you been married? He: Twice.

  102. Hey, don’t frown – you’ll never know who might be falling in love with your smile.

  103. Hey, don’t I know you? Yeah, you’re the girl/guy with the beautiful smile.

  104. Hey, how did you do that? (What?) Look so good?

  105. Hi, my name’s Right…Mr. Right.

  106. I don’t know you, but I think I love you already.

  107. Sit on my face, and I will eat my way to your heart.

  108. Are you a bank loan? Because you have my interest.

  109. Do you have an inhaler? Because you got that “ASS ”

  110. Thank God I am wearing gloves. {Why} because you would be too hot to handle.

  111. What is a sweet girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?

  112. Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I’ll give it back.

  113. If I were a skateboard, I would grind you the whole night.

  114. I would offer you a cigarette, but you are already smoking hot.

  115. Is your dad a preacher? Because girl, you are a blessing.

  116. They call me titanic because I will go down on you.

  117. If you were a triangle, you would be a cute

  118. Are you from Japan? Because I am trying to get in ja’panties.

  119. I cannot think of anyone else I would rather survive a zombie apocalypse with.

  120. I would like to do to your body what the Congress is doing to government employees.

  121. Your name must be Coca-Cola because you are soda-licious.

  122. I am not Asian, but I will eat your cat tonight

  123. Are these space pants? Because your ass is out of this world.

  124. You’re so hot my pants are falling for you.

  125. If we were both squirrels, would you help me bust a nut?

  126. What ’s a smart and attractive gentleman like me doing without your phone number?

  127. If you were a basketball, I would never shoot because I would always miss you.

  128. I do not believe in love at first sight, but I am going to make an exception for you.

  129. Is your dad Little Caesar’s? Because you are hot and ready.

  130. I am no hipster, but I can make your hips stir.

  131. You must be a snooze button because I want to hit you over and over again.

  132. Did you sit on a pile of sugar? Because you’ve got a pretty sweet ass.

  133. You have something on your ass. Oh, sorry it is just my eyes.

  134. I am learning about essential dates in history. Do you want to be one of them?

  135. You are so hot that if you ate bread, you would poop out toast.

  136. If I followed you home, would you keep me?

  137. I would tell you a joke about my Weiner, but it is too long.

  138. Do you buy your pants on sale? Because at my house they would be 100 percent off.

  139. I presume you have not studied enough because I’m about to give you the D.

  140. What do you and the weather have in common? You are both hot

  141. I am like a Rubik’s Cube. The more you play with me, the harder I become

  142. Did you invent the airplane? Because you seem wright to me.

  143. I would hide every chair in the world so that you would have to sit on my face.

  144. If I were an octopus, all my three hearts would beat for you.

  145. Do you have acne? Because I would like to get proactive with you.

  146. Do you have a name or can I call you mine?

  147. (hold out your hand) “Would you like to hold this for me as I go for a walk?”

  148. Hey, you should stop eating magnets. You are attracting me to you.

  149. If you were a transformer, your name would be Optimus Fine.

  150. You auto-complete

  151. Girl, you are like MasterCard…

  152. Are you physics 212? {NO} Well, you are just something I could not pass.

  153. Do you run track? Because I hear you “relay” want a kiss.

  154. You remind me of chapstick; you are the balm.

  155. Hey, I am writing a phonebook. Can I have your phone number?

  156. I must be a snowflake because I have fallen for you.

  157. Nice legs. What time do they open?

  158. I have lost that loving feeling. Will you help me find it again?

  159. Can you sleep with a stranger? {NO} Well, then my name is …..

  160. My name is “Nahashon.” Remember that; you will be screaming it

  161. I hope you know CPR because you are taking my breath away.

  162. Are you free tonight or will it cost me?

  163. Honey, I am wasted, but this condom in my wallet does not need to be.

  164. Your dad must be a hunter because you’re a fox.

  165. Could you kiss me on the cheeks so I can at least say a cute girl kissed me tonight?

  166. Hey, do you have a plaster? I hurt my knee falling for you.

  167. Were you covered in bees recently? I just assumed because you look sweeter than honey.

  168. You must be a snicker bar. {why?} because you satisfy

  169. I have noticed you noticing me, so I am just giving you notice that I have noticed you too.

  170. I will make you a deal. {what?} I will give you a kiss, and if you do not like it, you can return it.

  171. Hey did you fall out of heaven? Or were you just born an angel?

  172. Are you a hurricane? Because you are blowing me away.

  173. You must be a campfire because you are super hot and I want some more.

  174. If you were a booger, I would pick you first.

  175. Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only ten I see!!

  176. I have never been religious, but I am now because you are the answer to all my prayers.

  177. You must be in the wrong place. The Miss Universe contest is across the town.

  178. If I got a star for every time you brighten up my day, I would be holding a galaxy.

  179. Your shirt has to go, but you can stay.

  180. Where have I seen you before? Oh yes, I remember now. It was in the dictionary just before the word GORGEOUS.

  181. You sexy, you beautiful; I really want to make you mine.

  182. Is your dad a terrorist? Because girl, you are the bomb.

  183. If I flip this coin, what are my chances of getting “head” tonight?

  184. I am going to kiss you now. Say KISS ME if you want me to stop.

  185. Your striking beauty blinded me. I am going to need your phone number and name for insurance purposes.

  186. Are you a bomb? Because you are ticking me off.

  187. Are you fertile? I need a favor. {What favor} I need a baby by next year in order to receive my inheritance from my wealthy

  188. Can I have your picture? I want to show Santa what I want for Christmas.

  189. Call me Q because I need “U” next to me at all times.

  190. Your eyes are bluer than the Atlantic Ocean, and I do not mind getting lost at sea.

  191. Is your ass McDonald’s? Because I am lovin’ it.

  192. Nice pants. Can I test the zipper?

  193. You know what’s beautiful? Read the first word.

  194. I would never play hide and seek with you because people like you are hard to find.

  195. My friends over there need your phone number so they can know where to get a hold of me tomorrow morning.

  196. Are you a beaver? Because daaaaaamn.

  197. I heard you are looking for a stud. I have the std, and I just need “U.”

  198. Do you love Mexican food? Because I would like to wrap you in my arms and make you my BAEritto.

  199. You must be a high test score because I want to take you home and show off to my mom.

  200. I am Superman, and you are my Kryptonite.

  201. Hey, are you a knight? Because you slay.

  202. Are you Harambe’s enclosure? Cause I would drop a kid inside of you.

  203. Remember me? {No} oh that’s rights, I have only met you in my dreams.

  204. Did you fart? Because you just blew me away.

  205. Hey, can I call you north? {WHY} because every time you are around, my “compass” points at you.

  206. I wish I were toilet paper so I could touch your butt.

  207. Want a raisin? {NO} well, how about a date?

  208. You may fall from the sky or a tree, but the best way to fall is in love with me.

  209. My magic watch says you do not have any underwear on. Oh, you do? Then it must be 30 minutes faster.

  210. Your hands look heavy. Let me hold them for you.

  211.  You remind me of my pinky toe. You are cute, small, and I am probably going to bang you on my coffee table tonight.

  212. I heard you are good at algebra. Can you replace my X without asking Y?

  213.   Do you know I nicknamed my “HULK” the truth? I did it because most women cannot handle it.

  214.   Are you butt dialing? Because I could swear, that ass is calling me.

  215. Look at the tag on their shirt and then say: “Oh, I thought you were made in Heaven!”

  216. “If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.”

  217. “Hi, I’m suffering from amnesia… do I come here often?”

  218. “Do you have a twin sister? Cause I’ve seen you here before.”

  219. “If I followed you home, would you keep me?”

  220. “Were your parents thieves?” “No, why?””Because they must have stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.”

  221. “Hello.” Alternately try “Hi.”

  222. “Hi, do you like this band? I SAID, HI DO YOU LIKE THIS BAND?!?”

  223. “Didn’t I go to school with you?”

  224. “Haven’t you been in Cleo?”

  225. “Hi, can I buy you a drink?”

  226. “You must be my guardian angel?”

  227. “Your hair looks nice. What kind of shampoo do you use?

  228. “No wonder the sky is grey today, all the blue is in your eyes.”

  229. “I lost my phone number, could I borrow yours?”

  230. “Is your father a terrorist? Because you’re da bomb!”

  231. “What’s your star sign?”

  232. “I’ve stopped lighting fires now…”

  233. If you were a pair of pants I would wear you out.

  234. Do you mind if I hang out here until its safe back where I farted.

  235. You look life my first wife! (how many have you had?) none.

  236. Let’s make like a fabric softener and snuggle.

  237. You know, if I were you, I would have sex with me.

  238. I wish you were DSL so I could get high-speed access.

  239. I know its not Christmas, but Santa’s lap is always ready.

  240. Good news, the test results are negative!

  241. Got me? I’ll do your body good.

  242. Grab them in the butt and ask, “Pardon me, is this seat taken?”

  243. Hi, I’m Batman. Wanna see my batmobile?

  244. I have a cat. She would really like to meet you.

  245. Baby, you must be a broom, cause you just swept me off my feet.

  246. Do you have the time? [Gives the time] No, the time to write down my number?

  247. I think you’ve got something in your eye. Oh never mind, it’s just a sparkle.

  248. If beauty were sunlight, you’d shine from a million light-years away.

  249.   If you only knew the power of the Dork Side. Hey, Beautiful.

  250. I think I feel like Richard Gere – I’m standing next to you, the Pretty Woman.

  251.  I’ve just moved you to the top of my ‘to do’ list. Do you have a Band-aid?

     

For more great pick up lines you can read  Best Sweet and Cute Pick Up Lines  and  Top Offensive Pickup Lines For Guys

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