90 Funny Love Quotes that Will Make You Laugh

We all need a little laughter in our lives now and again, which is why funny love quotes are proving so incredibly popular with the online/social networking communities as of late. People say that laughter is the best medicine and they could quite very well be right.

Funny love quotes have the ability to make us smile, to make us giggle, to make us laugh, and to even break down into hysterics of laughter with tears streaming down our faces. Laughter brings people together, heals pains both real and imagined, and makes the world a more positive place to live.  Share these collection of hilarious and humorous funny love quotes with your loved one and have a day to remember.

90 Funny Love Quotes From the Heart

  1. Don’t break someone’s heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206 of them.Best Funny Love Quotes 1

  2. I want to be your favorite hello and hardest goodbye.

  3. I will kiss you in the rain so you are twice as wet.

  4. I wish love is like a baby shampoo… It has “NO MORE TEARS” Formula…

  5. The brain is the most outstanding organ. It works for 24 hours, 365 days, right from your birth until you fall in love.

  6. Love is a lot like a backache. It doesn’t show up on x-rays, but you know it’s there.

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  7. I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then walk into a pole.

  8. You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.

  9. “No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying.”

  10. Love is spending the rest of your life with someone you want to kill & and not doing it because you’d miss them.Best Funny Love Quotes 2

  11. A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens to him.” -Brendan Francis

  12. A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.-Ingrid Bergman

  13. “True love is like ghosts, which everybody talks about and few have seen.” -La Rochefoucauld

  14. Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.

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  15. The other night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy negligee. The only trouble is, she was coming home.

  16. Many a young lady does not realize just how strong her love for a young man is until he fails to pass the approval test with her parents.

  17. Men should nod in agreement rather than open their mouth to express their opinion.Best Funny Love Quotes 3

  18. You can marry almost any gentleman you desire, so long as you repeat the magic sentence,”You are terrific.”

  19. Every marriage can be perfect until you stop trying.

  20. The happiest of marriages would be between a blind woman and deaf man.

  21. My wife is the most fantastic woman on the entire planet. And that is not just my opinion, that’s hers.

  22. Some folks ask me why I have such affection for you. I tell them that you don’t ask pesky and invasive questions like some folks.

  23. Only look down upon your loved one when you attempt to help her up.

  24. Men are mostly in love with any female who will listen to them.

  25. If one desires peace in the household, one needs to abide by the wife’s wishes.

  26. To love and win is the best thing. To love and lose, the next best.

  27. In romance, women are the experts, the men are just beginners.

  28. To find happiness with a woman, one must desire her completely but never attempt to comprehend her.

  29. Bachelors are more knowledgeable about women than men who are married. That is why they are still single.

  30. All wives hold true that is the man’s responsibility to make the cash and their responsibility to spend it.

  31. Most guys are more interested in women who are interested in them than they are in women with a beautiful face.

  32. To explain to a woman what she should not do is to tell her what she must do.

  33. Never get married with hope that your guy will change. Guys don’t know how to.Best Funny Love Quotes 5

  34. The perfect Boyfriend doesn’t drink, smoke, cheat or exist.

  35. Love means never having to say anything because you are both looking at your smart phones

  36. If you want peace in the house, do what your wife wants. African proverb

  37. An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her. Agatha Christie

  38. If you want to read about love and marriage you’ve got to buy two separate books. Alan King

  39. Love at first sight is cured by the second look. American proverb

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  40. A man who is honest with himself wants a woman to be soft and feminine, careful of what she’s saying and talk like a man. Ann-Margret

  41. Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards. Benjamin Franklin

  42. No woman ever falls in love with a man unless she has a better opinion of him than he deserves. Edgar Watson Howe

  43. True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. Erich SegalBest Funny Love Quotes 6

  44. Love is something that hangs up behind the bathroom door and smells of Lysol. Ernest Hemmingway

  45. Love lasts about seven years. That’s how long it takes for the cells of the body to totally replace themselves. Francoise Sagan

  46. Love and smoke cannot behidden. French proverb

  47. Just because you love someone doesn’t mean you have to be involved with them. Love is not a bandage to cover wounds. Hugh Elliott

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  48. Love is like pi – natural irrational and very important. Lisa Hoffman

  49. Bachelors know more about women than married men. If they didn’t they would be married too. H. L. Mencken

  50. You can’t buy love, but you can pay heavily for it. Henny Youngman

  51. A woman knows how to keep quiet when she is in the right, whereas a man, when he is in the right, will keep on talking. Malcolm de Chazalfunny love quotes 5

  52. Women like silent men. They think they’re listening. Marcel Achard

  53. The average man is more interested in a woman who is interested in him than he is in a woman with beautiful legs. Marlene Dietrich

  54. You can’t put a price tag on love, but you can on all its accessories. Melanie Clark

  55. Love never dies of starvation, but often of indegestion. Ninon de L’enclos

  56. Love is the emotion that a woman feels always for a poodle dog and sometimes for a man. George Jean Nathanfunny love quotes 8

  57. My boyfriend not allowed to hide his phone from me. As long as we’re together it’s not an iPhone, it’s a wePhone.

  58. Love is the 7th sense of Human that destroys all the six senses and make the person believe Non-Sense.

  59. I love you with all my boobs. I’d say my heart, but my boobs are bigger.

  60. If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?Best Funny Love Quotes 7

  61. Relationships are like fat people, most of them don’t work out.

  62. I love you more than words can describe, numbers can count and the forever growing universe can discover.

  63. I’m not sure which is worse … missing you, or the fact that there’s nothing I can do about it.

  64. When a girls ask a guy to listen to song,it is because the lyrics are all the words she is afraid to say.

  65. “I am happy for you” is the hardest line to tell when your old love found someone new.

  66. I may look like a potato now but one day I’ll turn into fries and you’ll all want me then.

  67. Love is like a fart. It’s warm, unpredictable. And sometimes it stinks, but it can also be the best feeling in the world.

  68. Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it is probably shit.

  69. I love you like a fat kid loves cake.

  70. I promise to be with you forever even though you leave the toilet seat up.best funny love quotes 2

  71. “Being a good husband is life being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner.” – Jerry Seinfeld

  72. “Love is the answer, but while you’re waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.” – Woody Allen

  73. “Love is temporary insanity curable by marriage.” – Ambrose Bierce

  74. The reason that husbands and wives do not understand each other is because they belong to different sexes. Dorothy Dix

  75. “Woman are meant to be loved, not to be understood.” – Oscar Wildebest funny love quotes 3

  76. Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in. – Richard Jeni

  77. When guys get jealous it’s kinda cute. When girls get jealous world war III is about to start.

  78. Facebook should have a limit on how many times you can change your relationship status. After 3 it should default to ‘Unstable’.

  79. I know nothing about sex, because I was always married. Zsa Zsa Gabor

  80. A beautiful woman who is pleasing to men is good only for frightening fish when she falls into the water. Zen proverbbest funny love quotes 4

  81. My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me. Winston Churchill

  82. Love is hiding who you are at all times. It’s wearing make-up to bed and going downstairs to Burger King to poop.

  83. It wasn’t love at first sight. It took a full five minutes. – Lucille Ball

  84. Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. – Joan Crawford

  85. Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing. – Natasha Leggero

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  86. Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth. Deal with it. – George Carlin

  87. I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

  88. First love is a kind of vaccination which saves man from catching the complaint the second time. – Honore de Balzac

  89. Love is the answer, but while you’re waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions. – Woody Allen

  90. Love is temporary insanity curable by marriage. – Ambrose Bierce

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Hopefully these funny love quotes can help to bring a little bit of love and a little bit of humor into your life.  Remember, no matter what life throws at you, you can always throw it back as long as you keep some humor in your heart and a smile on your face.

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